Characteristics of Success

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people, and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. That is to have succeeded."
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Like beauty success is in the eyes of the beholder. Success is something that you must define for yourself. It has been said: "Never pity a man who has everything that is important to him and pity the man who has everything but what is important to him". I hope that working through your goals has helped you to define what success means to you. This section of the planner is not to define what success is but to work through some of the fundamental principles that can help you reach your goals. It is common knowledge and clear what the principles are for achievement and that is what we want to help you do, achieve your goals.

To talk a little more about success I would like to refer to a highly recommended book called "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill. Under the guidance of Andrew Carnegie, Napoleon Hill had studied 500 of the richest men of America to try to better understand the road to success. Many of these men have claimed that his teachings contributed to their vast fortunes. Some of these men are Thomas A. Edison who became the world's greatest inventor with only 3 months of formal schooling, Charles M. Schwab, Henry Ford, Theodore Roosevelt, Wilber Wright, John D. Rockefeller, F. W. Woolworth, Woodrow Wilson, Alexander Graham Bell. He stated at the beginning of the book that he will mention over 100 times the keys to success and making money. This is something that you must see with your inner eyes if it is going to have any impact on your life, if you are ready for it. After reading the book you will come to the conclusion that the answer is summed up in this quote of his.

I do happen to strongly agree with this quote and that is why I put together some of the most powerful processes for identifying your major definite purpose, your A1 goal. For the remainder of The Life Goals Planner we will discuss and provide exercises in these foundational achievement characteristics.

Organization
Time Management
Making decisions
Personal Development

Just as there are characteristics of success there are characteristics of failure. Let's review a list that Napoleon Hill recorded in his book Think and Grow Rich.

1) Failure to identify exactly what one wants
2) Procrastination with or without cause
3) Lack of interest in acquiring specialized knowledge
4) Indecision
5) Habit of creating excuses instead of plans to get
6) Self-satisfaction
7) Indifference, ready to compromise instead of fight
8) Habit of projecting blame
9) Weakness of desire
10) Willingness, even eagerness, to quit at the first sign of defeat
11) Lack of organized plans
12) Habit of neglecting to move on ideas
13) Wishing instead of willing
14) Habit of compromising with poverty instead of aiming at riches
15) Searching for all the short cuts, trying to get without giving
16) Fear of criticism.

Nobody wants to fail but many do not realize how subtle it is. Like success, it is the little things added up month after month that will soon benefit you or rob you of the joys of life. Procrastination, laziness, indecision, pride and arrogance, mocking and destructive criticism, constant complaining, and neglect are the big ones, especially neglect. Neglect is a disease; it's a subtle attitude that will lead you right into the formula for failure. Should do it, could do it, don't do it. Here is a simple analogy we can all relate to. Bacteria can be defined as an alien hostile life force with an agenda to take over a host system for its own survival. Germs look for openings in the skin like a cut or a scrape. Now if you get a little infection (bacteria) on this cut or scrape you can go to the medicine cabinet and pour a little rubbing alcohol on it and it probably won't turn into much. If you don't treat that infection, it is likely it to grow until you are going to have to see a doctor to get antibiotics to kill what a little shot of alcohol will no longer affect because your immune system has been penetrated and compromised. That's the disease neglect. It starts as a little infection and if we don't deal with it, it will grow and spread until it robs you of all of life's values, happiness, joys and successes.

Now let's move on to the positive. I would like to share with you some of the characteristics of successful people whom I have studied. I call it the G.A.P. theory. I have adopted this acronym to help me remember the common personal characteristics of great men and women of the past and to remember the big 3 characteristics that they have all seemed to master.

The G.A.P. theory is not a theory but a fact. It is the fact that these three fundamentals produce most all of the characteristics of successful men and women around the world. It is these qualities and characteristics that set apart the winners. It is these characteristics and qualities that will be produced in you as you engage in the process of doing, becoming and having all that life offers.

G = Goals A = Attitude P = Personal Development

Consider these values or characteristics and check which ones you feel you have and circle those which you feel you should improve upon. Now that you have completed the section Laying the Foundation you probably have most if not all of the traits under Goals on the left, but what about the other two boxes. What is your attitude like? What personal development traits to you display in your daily life or better yet when things get a little tough. Can you still act with integrity? Do you still have the courage to make the right decision even when it may cost you some time or money?

What three people dead or alive do you truly respect and admire? List the qualities of those people that you admire and keep them in mind for your personal development goals.

Ask yourself these questions in regards to your attitude;

1) Do you find yourself "whining" often? (yes or no)

Example: When things are not going right in your life you do you find yourself asking "why" as in the sense "poor me, why does this always happen to me"

Problem: This characteristic often stems from failing to take personal responsibility. We can easily fall into the "victim mentality" instead of understanding that problems in life are there for us to grow, overcome and learn. This characteristic can ruin relationships and should be dealt with right away.

Solution: I have found the best way to deal with this problem is to become solution-minded. Be aware of your self talk and instead of asking "why", ask "how" or "what". What can I learn from this situation? How can I overcome this problem?

2) Do you find yourself being negative, judgmental or critical of others on a regular basis? Do you find yourself often pointing at others and having critical or negative comments? (yes or no)

Problem: This is another relationship-destroying characteristic that usually stems from insecurity and/or having been hurt emotionally and not healed. Often we point out faults and weaknesses in others to feel that we are okay when if fact the opposite is true. The more we judge and criticize others the more immature and weak we look. Remember most people mirror things in themselves.

Solution: I have found that having some clear goals to focus on and engaging in a personal growth plan will deal with 90% of this problem. Sometimes we may need the help of a professional counselor if we have some deep resentment that is too scary to get in touch with.

3) When ever confronted with a challenge about your character, progress or your activities do you find yourself giving a bunch of excuses why you are where you are? When challenged by someone regarding your actions or behaviors do you find yourself justifying, defending and rationalizing all the time? (yes or no)

Problem: Insecure, you are not being teachable. People certainly are not perfect, but understand that it is people that we learn from and others can often see things in us that we can't see. We all have our blind spots and we need to be more open to what others see in us. Remember rationalizing usually means "rationing lies"

Solution: Be teachable, listen to what other have to say. You don't have to take their advice but you can certainly respect their opinion and may ponder what they have said and see where you may have some room for improvement.

4) Do you find yourself frustrated on a regular basis? Do you have the same problems that you had 3 months, 6 months or 1 year ago? (yes or no)

Problem: Lack of personal growth and/or clarity of personal goals.

Solution: Think through your life goals, set up some disciplines and get involved in some personal development. Complete the exercises in the "Life Goals Planner"

5) Do you find yourself constantly saying "I should have done this or I should have done that" (yes or no)

6) Do you always compare yourself to others? Do you find yourself jealous or envious of others? Do you find yourself saying "if he/she was a better teacher" or "they are no help"?

7) Do you complain that things are too tough, costs are too high and the company, government or systems are all screwed up? Do you find yourself complaining about other people, circumstances or situations on a regular basis? (yes or no)

8) If someone points out a character problem with you, do you respond by insulting them or pointing out everything that’s wrong with them? (yes or no)

We all have some of these problems but if you find yourself answering "yes" because it's a common occurrence, then I encourage you to be honest with yourself and begin to make the necessary changes. Most of these attitudes stem from:

1.an unhealthy belief system about yourself or others
2.lack of personal responsibility
3.unclear goals, purpose, meaning and direction in one's life

Don't let attitude rob you from the joys of success, make the necessary corrections and watch as your life begins to take on new meaning and perspective.

Attitude has been best summed up by James Rohn.

What creates a winning attitude. It is captured in the last line. "we and we alone" It is taking 100% responsibility. We need to take full responsibility but we also need to accept some things the way they are and seek the wisdom to know which one is which. This thought is summed up in this famous prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971) The Serenity Prayer. "Oh God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time"

Accepting what you can't change and changing what you can displays wisdom. We all have faults and weaknesses, it is widely accepted that humans have many biological and psychological weaknesses.

Many of us have been inherited genetic problems like diabetes or the increased likelihood of alcoholism. Maybe what's happened to you up to this point has not been all your fault. We have all been through some tough stuff, some tougher than others. We are all affected by our upbringing, experiences and our environment much of which we had no control over but from here on, to solve our problems, we must take full responsibility. Reexamine the list of things you thought were the reason for not being, doing and having all that you anticipated and take them off the list and put you on it. Realize every time you bring up an excuse you limit your ability to overcome. You have identified your goals and the road is not straight, you are going to have some curves, hills, rocks and streams to go through but now you have a positive attitude, goals and ideas that can ensure your success.

"Man must cease attributing his problems to his environment, and learn again to exercise his will, his personal responsibility"
~ Albert Schweitzer ~